I think this week is all about positive affirmations. Our parents came and visited us from Utah for Jordan's white coat ceremony and we had a blast, but since they've been gone (only for about a day) already I can feel this dark cloud coming over me. I am sad they are gone. I am sad I am not with them. I am sad that I am no longer in a familiar place, with hardly any familiar names, and no close friends. Getting to know people and places is so much work! I don't regret moving though. I'll never regret supporting my husband and cheering him on as he takes his first medical school test (was that today?...Wonder how it went...) and ultimately aspires to become a doctor.
I am reminded of the little train who said "I think I can...I think I can." That train didn't just "think", but put action to that thought and eventually finished the race. I "think" I can overcome these things, but I KNOW that faith without action is dead works. I know that if I put myself to work, I can overcome any obstacle in life. I could have all the faith in the world, but without proving my faith, it would be for nothing. As with any trial in our life, we have to just keep putting one step in front of the other. We can't just sit there waiting for divine intervention. God gives us the other side of the hill as a reward for climbing up that hill. So, even though I am feeling down right now, I will continue to try to make new friends and I will annoy Olivia to death with all my hugs and kisses because she's my little buddy right now and sometimes the only social contact I have.
She has been learning so much this past week. Her Aunt Hannah gave her a baby doll and Olivia loves to try and feed it with the bottle (she gets annoyed that nothing comes out) and loves to give it kisses and hugs. Before the grandparents left, she took her first real steps with them all! It's funny that I thought of that Little Train, because speaking of which, Olivia has a train that she just loves to push around and play with. It's probably her favorite toy! I know it has helped her develop her walking skills and it amazes me how much she learns and grows each week. It seems like we are all growing up a little bit more and changing. Jordan is going to be a doctor, I'm learning how to be a better mom and nurse, and Olivia is learning how to be a toddler. I started working out last night and it took all of my guilt-tripping persuasive mind powers to get me on that treadmill. I don't know why I fought it so much because it wasn't bad at all. I'm doing this 21 day workout program that I found online that will help me kickstart getting into shape. After 21 days I hope that I will be able to stay in the habit of working out and continue my journey on becoming a healthy person. This first week I have to keep telling myself to just go do it. Drop everything and get your workout in.
This whole week will be full of positive affirmations, but I know I can do it. I know I can make Texas my new home in time. TTT, Things Take Time. I can't believe that there will come a day when I will be sad to be leaving this chapter of my life, but I know it will happen. If I can just immerse myself in my new life, I think I'll have a really wonderful time here. If you think of us, give us a call or text or a little love note on Facebook. I know we would love to hear from you. These last couple of days have been hard, but I will get over it. There is another side to my hill and I'm nearly there...
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Saturday, July 20, 2013
For the Beauty of the Earth...We're not in Utah anymore folks
I said I was going to post about our trip to Texas and here it is. We started out our trip July 5th on Friday morning with tearful goodbyes and a prayer that all would go well on this trip and that we could be safe and get to our destination as planned. We had to make a quick stop to the autoshop that had fixed our AC because there was water leaking into the passenger side. It was an easy fix and didn't cost a thing and soon we were on our way. The morning drive was uneventful. We had just passed through Panguitch when things started to get interesting. We heard some noise from the car and then suddenly we had to pull over. There was a bunch of steam coming from the hood of the car, but I knew something else had happened. It seemed like our radiator wasn't working correctly so Jordan poured some water into it and we had some lunch on the side of the road and, after a policeman pulled over to help, we drove back into Panguitch and found a place to fix the car. Our car sounded souped up and I could tell that something was wrong with the muffler because I had had this problem before. We found out that the muffler had fallen off (you could clearly see it dragging under the car) and we drove down the road to a welding shop where they welded it back on for a steal of a deal. We got back on our way quickly, but an hour or two later we had stopped again because the radiator was still acting up. Jordan had a feeling we should stop and so we pulled over again into a little convenient store/autoshop. The guy told us he thought our radiator cap might be bad. He tested the car for a leak, but couldn't find one and then inspected the cap. Sure enough, our cap didn't look right and so he replaced the coolant and the cap for a small price. It was a stressful first day, but after some more prayers and some really helpful people, we made it back on the road without another hitch the first day. We had had the car inspected before we left for Texas and thought we were in good shape, but there always seems to be something. Despite our prayers that the car would perform well, it seems that wasn't in the cards for us, but that first day we could see that God was watching over us. The first time we broke down, we were only 10 minutes away from the shop and the second time Jordan had already passed one place on the road that he could have stopped, but then another place popped up and he had an impression he should stop. If he hadn't followed what I believe to be the Spirit prompting him, I think it would have been a long time before we found another place. The rest of the drive was so scenic and beautiful. We drove near Bryce canyon and past the Coral Pink Sand dunes. The canyon we drove through had been carved by the wind and it was so smooth and layered, that we just stared in awe as we passed by. Eventually we made it to Lake Powell. It was about 5 or 6pm, but we still stopped and decided to get into the lake. I had never been and the water was surprisingly warm. Olivia loved it, but our dog Loki, not so much. It was a nice, relaxing end to a crazy day. We had surely seen God's hand in our lives and in the world around us and we felt comforted.
Day 2:
The next day we left our hotel in Page, AZ at about 9AM. We stopped to see Glen Canyon and then we drove for a few hours and finally arrived at our next destination for the day: The Grand Canyon. It was 25 bucks to get into the park, but it was a site worth the money. It looked like it was going to rain, but we arrived at the perfect time. The sun was still peaking out of the overcast skies and the shadows over the canyon was breathtaking. It was warm, but not uncomfortable. As we took a family picture next to a wall straddling the edge of the canyon, Loki jumped up onto the wall and almost fell over it to his death. I guess he really wanted to be in the family picture. After viewing the amazing scenes of the canyon, we got back in our car and drove to the Canyon Village. We stopped a couple of times to see more amazing views and some giant elk that were just sitting on the edge of the forest eating and resting. It began to rain really hard, but we finally made it to the village. We watched some movies about the Grand Canyon and just relaxed. After about an hour or so, we got back into the car and drove to Flagstaff, AZ where we stayed the night. The day had been perfect and it was amazing to see God's creations.
Day 3:
The agenda on this day was just to drive, drive, drive. We drove to Lubbock, TX. The most eventful thing that happened, I suppose, was that we drove through New Mexico and into Texas. I tasted my first taco at Jack in the Box, which was wonderful. I don't think I've ever had such a tasty fast-food taco. We also drove to the Lubbock temple and again felt comforted by the fact that although we were getting further and further away from our family, God was always nearby.
Day 4:
I almost don't want to write about this day because it was so disappointing, but it has a happy ending and so I guess it's worth telling. We started out the day in a timely manner. We were going to drive from Lubbock to Fort Worth where we would meet my Aunt and Uncle, but somewhere between there, our car ran over something metallic and our tire blew. We were forced to pull over on the highway in the middle-of-nowhere and figure out what to do. Jordan was going to change the tire and use the spare, but to our shock and horror the spare was flat. My cell was getting crappy reception (I HATE T-Mobile) and I lost contact with my insurance agent who was getting us a tow. Jordan was on the phone with Pep Boys (we had gotten the tires through them) and was talking to them about getting a tow. They said they would send someone out to where we were and so we waited...and waited...and waited some more. They said it would only be 30-40 minutes until they would arrive, but it had been an hour, and even with the air conditioning on, the car was heating up and so were our tempers and stress levels. It was so hard being packed in a little car in a humid place surrounded by weeds and giant yellow, cricket-like bugs with wings (cicadas) surrounding us. We had been there so long that my poor bladder couldn't take it anymore and I had to courageously get out of the car and pass through that field of bugs so I could find some privacy to relieve myself. It's times like these I wish I was a boy. Jordan called Pep Boys again and it turned out that they were looking for us about 40 miles away from where we were. We all groaned in distress and worry. I was in the car, trying to distract Olivia, and I said a quick prayer out loud, pleading with God to help us. Suddenly Jordan slapped his hand on the window and told me to get out. I looked at the back of the car and a large truck was pulled up behind us. I was surprised to find that it was a police officer, better yet, the chief of police. He didn't look like any police officer I had ever seen. He looked a little like Kurt Russel, but a lot more tan with a cigar hanging out of his mouth that he continued to chew the whole time we were with him. His vehicle was covered inside-out with deer-hunting paraphernalia and two giant guns hanging from the inside of his cab and a pair of handcuffs hanging off his steering wheel. We all piled into his truck without hesitation and he drove us to an air pump where we filled the spare. He then drove us back to our car and we were soon on our way. Olivia was very angry at all of this though and was having a loud meltdown in the back. She wouldn't take food or bottle and the only way I could comfort her was to give her her blanket and stuffed bunny to stroke her cheek. We drove all the way to Fort Worth on that spare tire and then walked in the hot sun to get some McDonald's down the road. On our way back to the car we stopped for snow cones. We didn't have quite enough money for what we ordered and she didn't take credit cards, but the lady simply took some money out of the tip jar and let us go on our way with a smile. Thinking about this experience now brings tears to my eyes at the simple gesture. Perhaps God put her in our path as well to give us a small blessing on a day of disaster. Looking at the whole situation from afar, I can clearly see how blessed we were. We could have been in that car for hours waiting for someone to help us, and yet, a police officer stopped to help, even allowing us to ride with him to make sure we were taken care of. This woman gave some of her hard-earned money to us so that we could enjoy the simple, cool pleasure of a snow cone on a hot day. The tire fiasco had put us hours out of our way and sadly, we were unable to stop at my Aunt and Uncles because it would put us in Houston too late. We drove away feeling sad, but relieved that we were finally back on the road. As we got closer and closer to our new home, my downtrodden attitude disappeared as I started seeing greenery everywhere. Palm trees and rain-forests started popping up everywhere and suddenly we saw buildings! Tall, bright buildings lit up the night sky and my excitement rose. I eagerly watched the road, waiting to see what we had been travelling to see and suddenly we were in Houston. We drove to our friends' place and stayed the night in their apartment (which happened to be in the same complex that we live in now) and the next morning got the keys to our own apartment.
The next week was a lot of shopping for groceries, Shopping for things for our home, and unpacking. In a matter of days we had transformed our apartment into our new home. We love the "Texas-sized closets", the pool and work-out room, the fact that Olivia has her own room and finally a crib, and we feel that it is truly a step-up from our last apartment. We have visited Hermann Park where we saw A Chorus Line for free. We have been swimming, and had some good BBQ, and we have already been making friends. We like our new ward already and it seems there will be a lot of friends for us and for Olivia. It's amazing how everything works out. If there is one thing I have learned in life, it is to trust in God. No matter how the situation may seem, it is never impossible if God is on your side and you ask him for help. I can say that things didn't turn out quite like I thought they would, but we are here in Texas safe and sound and that is really all I wanted. We had a fun, family-strengthening trip and now we are here in Texas moving on with our lives. The freeways still scare me to death and although I have a job already, things are still uncertain in the financial department of our lives, but I know we will make it through. God is with us, so how can we doubt?
Day 2:
The next day we left our hotel in Page, AZ at about 9AM. We stopped to see Glen Canyon and then we drove for a few hours and finally arrived at our next destination for the day: The Grand Canyon. It was 25 bucks to get into the park, but it was a site worth the money. It looked like it was going to rain, but we arrived at the perfect time. The sun was still peaking out of the overcast skies and the shadows over the canyon was breathtaking. It was warm, but not uncomfortable. As we took a family picture next to a wall straddling the edge of the canyon, Loki jumped up onto the wall and almost fell over it to his death. I guess he really wanted to be in the family picture. After viewing the amazing scenes of the canyon, we got back in our car and drove to the Canyon Village. We stopped a couple of times to see more amazing views and some giant elk that were just sitting on the edge of the forest eating and resting. It began to rain really hard, but we finally made it to the village. We watched some movies about the Grand Canyon and just relaxed. After about an hour or so, we got back into the car and drove to Flagstaff, AZ where we stayed the night. The day had been perfect and it was amazing to see God's creations.
Day 3:
The agenda on this day was just to drive, drive, drive. We drove to Lubbock, TX. The most eventful thing that happened, I suppose, was that we drove through New Mexico and into Texas. I tasted my first taco at Jack in the Box, which was wonderful. I don't think I've ever had such a tasty fast-food taco. We also drove to the Lubbock temple and again felt comforted by the fact that although we were getting further and further away from our family, God was always nearby.
Day 4:
I almost don't want to write about this day because it was so disappointing, but it has a happy ending and so I guess it's worth telling. We started out the day in a timely manner. We were going to drive from Lubbock to Fort Worth where we would meet my Aunt and Uncle, but somewhere between there, our car ran over something metallic and our tire blew. We were forced to pull over on the highway in the middle-of-nowhere and figure out what to do. Jordan was going to change the tire and use the spare, but to our shock and horror the spare was flat. My cell was getting crappy reception (I HATE T-Mobile) and I lost contact with my insurance agent who was getting us a tow. Jordan was on the phone with Pep Boys (we had gotten the tires through them) and was talking to them about getting a tow. They said they would send someone out to where we were and so we waited...and waited...and waited some more. They said it would only be 30-40 minutes until they would arrive, but it had been an hour, and even with the air conditioning on, the car was heating up and so were our tempers and stress levels. It was so hard being packed in a little car in a humid place surrounded by weeds and giant yellow, cricket-like bugs with wings (cicadas) surrounding us. We had been there so long that my poor bladder couldn't take it anymore and I had to courageously get out of the car and pass through that field of bugs so I could find some privacy to relieve myself. It's times like these I wish I was a boy. Jordan called Pep Boys again and it turned out that they were looking for us about 40 miles away from where we were. We all groaned in distress and worry. I was in the car, trying to distract Olivia, and I said a quick prayer out loud, pleading with God to help us. Suddenly Jordan slapped his hand on the window and told me to get out. I looked at the back of the car and a large truck was pulled up behind us. I was surprised to find that it was a police officer, better yet, the chief of police. He didn't look like any police officer I had ever seen. He looked a little like Kurt Russel, but a lot more tan with a cigar hanging out of his mouth that he continued to chew the whole time we were with him. His vehicle was covered inside-out with deer-hunting paraphernalia and two giant guns hanging from the inside of his cab and a pair of handcuffs hanging off his steering wheel. We all piled into his truck without hesitation and he drove us to an air pump where we filled the spare. He then drove us back to our car and we were soon on our way. Olivia was very angry at all of this though and was having a loud meltdown in the back. She wouldn't take food or bottle and the only way I could comfort her was to give her her blanket and stuffed bunny to stroke her cheek. We drove all the way to Fort Worth on that spare tire and then walked in the hot sun to get some McDonald's down the road. On our way back to the car we stopped for snow cones. We didn't have quite enough money for what we ordered and she didn't take credit cards, but the lady simply took some money out of the tip jar and let us go on our way with a smile. Thinking about this experience now brings tears to my eyes at the simple gesture. Perhaps God put her in our path as well to give us a small blessing on a day of disaster. Looking at the whole situation from afar, I can clearly see how blessed we were. We could have been in that car for hours waiting for someone to help us, and yet, a police officer stopped to help, even allowing us to ride with him to make sure we were taken care of. This woman gave some of her hard-earned money to us so that we could enjoy the simple, cool pleasure of a snow cone on a hot day. The tire fiasco had put us hours out of our way and sadly, we were unable to stop at my Aunt and Uncles because it would put us in Houston too late. We drove away feeling sad, but relieved that we were finally back on the road. As we got closer and closer to our new home, my downtrodden attitude disappeared as I started seeing greenery everywhere. Palm trees and rain-forests started popping up everywhere and suddenly we saw buildings! Tall, bright buildings lit up the night sky and my excitement rose. I eagerly watched the road, waiting to see what we had been travelling to see and suddenly we were in Houston. We drove to our friends' place and stayed the night in their apartment (which happened to be in the same complex that we live in now) and the next morning got the keys to our own apartment.
The next week was a lot of shopping for groceries, Shopping for things for our home, and unpacking. In a matter of days we had transformed our apartment into our new home. We love the "Texas-sized closets", the pool and work-out room, the fact that Olivia has her own room and finally a crib, and we feel that it is truly a step-up from our last apartment. We have visited Hermann Park where we saw A Chorus Line for free. We have been swimming, and had some good BBQ, and we have already been making friends. We like our new ward already and it seems there will be a lot of friends for us and for Olivia. It's amazing how everything works out. If there is one thing I have learned in life, it is to trust in God. No matter how the situation may seem, it is never impossible if God is on your side and you ask him for help. I can say that things didn't turn out quite like I thought they would, but we are here in Texas safe and sound and that is really all I wanted. We had a fun, family-strengthening trip and now we are here in Texas moving on with our lives. The freeways still scare me to death and although I have a job already, things are still uncertain in the financial department of our lives, but I know we will make it through. God is with us, so how can we doubt?
Monday, July 15, 2013
How Ya'll Doin'?
It's been a while since I've posted something on here and in the past this place has been mostly dedicated to my writing and a little bit to my family. I will tell you now that that is all going to change. As I have anticipated moving to Houston, Texas I realized what a great blessing modern-day technology is to us all. We have the privilege of speaking to our loved ones over the phone and on Skype and instant messaging. We are able to talk on Facebook and update our families instantly to what is going on in our lives. Never have we been so close, yet unable to touch. I hope that this blog can provide a way for those interested to keep track of our lives and to share in precious moments. I hope that our relationships will continue to grow and that through my writing you will discover something new about me. I miss all my friends and family dearly, but I look forward to seeing you again!
This is a short post, but I also just wanted to explain my blog title real quick. If you don't know, my daughter's name is Olivia Jewel. She goes by many nicknames, but one nickname I am especially fond of is Olive Juice. When you whisper "Olive Juice" to a person over a crowd it looks like you are saying "I love you", which I find to be very sweet. Olivia's first syllables of her name when combined also sound like Olive Juice, therefore you get J+K=Olive Juice. So that's it, folks. Keep your eyes open for the next couple of days because I plan a writing a post about our trip here and what's happened so far!
XOXO
K
This is a short post, but I also just wanted to explain my blog title real quick. If you don't know, my daughter's name is Olivia Jewel. She goes by many nicknames, but one nickname I am especially fond of is Olive Juice. When you whisper "Olive Juice" to a person over a crowd it looks like you are saying "I love you", which I find to be very sweet. Olivia's first syllables of her name when combined also sound like Olive Juice, therefore you get J+K=Olive Juice. So that's it, folks. Keep your eyes open for the next couple of days because I plan a writing a post about our trip here and what's happened so far!
XOXO
K
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Pregnancy TMI ALERT!
I haven't written anything about being pregnant besides in my journal and today I decided it was time to share. All of you are probably thinking that my pregnancy has been a dream full of butterflies and fairydust, but the reality of it all is that pregnancy for me hasn't been without its downfalls. I'll admit, being slightly overweight did not help me on my journey to having a baby and I've pretty much had massive stretch marks from day one. Funny story, so Jordan broke our full-length mirror shortly into my pregnancy, which is probably a good thing now. Let me explain: I am a well-endowed girl in the upper chest department and some nights lying on my side I would find that I couldn't breathe and I was super uncomfortable, not to mention that I was finding my old bra just wasn't cutting it anymore, and so I waddled on over to Motherhood Maternity and they literally gave me 20 bras to try on! As I was there in the changing room, I had my first look at my swollen belly complete with all my stretch marks....I had my first pregnancy breakdown that day. I cried on the phone to my mom and told her Jordan would never like the way I looked again (something he denies up and down, telling me I'm beautiful no matter what), and that I was completely ugly! It was a hard day, but the next day I woke up and I felt a lot better and my focus had shifted away from the drama of the previous day. It has been a struggle for me, but I'm learning to find the beauty in pregnancy and I'm also learning that like Tinker Bell, pregnant women also have very little room for emotions (one minute we're happy and the next we're completely bawling our eyes out, and one minute we're nice and the next it's like we've been possessed by a demon).
This pregnancy has also been filled with disaster, luckily my sweet baby Olivia Jewel has been unaffected, but her mom might be crazier for all that she had to go through. Between April and May, I was involved in not one, but TWO car accidents in the span of three weeks. I won't go into the details, but both times I was sent to the hospital to be monitored and have the baby monitored. The second time I was having contractions, but I didn't even notice because of all that had happened. I'm not to the end of the road yet though, and although my baby looks beautiful on the monitor and in the Ultrasound pictures, I'm expecting to give birth to a 3-headed dragon who won't stop crying. I guess a mother will never stop worrying about her children...
Some of the little things I've gone through are the normal things you hear about, difficultly sleeping in the last trimester: check. Acid reflux: check (Oddly enough the only thing I felt could cure my acid reflux is root beer; it doesn't make sense, I know, but man that root beer is good stuff). I'd also like to give a shout-out to Tums (the generic berry flavors are disgusting and the real-deal regular Tums are good, but both are just as effective) and to Pepcid AC. Without either of these, I could not get through my day. Nausea and vomiting: check. I didn't have too much sickness in the beginning, but I do remember that a certain, strong-smelling soup made me vomit on our way home from a party. Swelling in my ankles and feet: check, but not too much thankfully. Feeling extremely hot: check. I'd suggest NEVER doing the Fourth of July in your ninth month of pregnancy, it is just miserable. Crazy dreams: check. Back aches: DOUBLE CHECK!
Yesterday, I had my first false alarm labor attack. I knew I probably wasn't in labor, but after spending the afternoon shopping with my sweet mother-in-law, I guess I kind of overdid it and became dehydrated, although I swear I had been drinking a lot of fluids that day and it just goes to show it's never enough when you're pregnant and almost a hundred degrees outside. Anyway, so as we're walking around the mall I start to feel pressure in my lower back kind of like the ache you get when your hips are separating, but the pressure doesn't go away, it just gets worse, until nothing I do to try to relieve the pain makes it go away. The pain builds to a point where I can barely talk and then goes in and out like waves. It felt like the worst back period cramps I've ever had, but strangely I'm not having any regular contractions. My mother-in-law encourages me to call the doctors' office and so I do and of course they tell me to come in and get checked out, even though they tell me it doesn't sound like real labor. At that point I didn't care, the pain the was so excruciating and I just wanted some relief and answers. So I go in and sure enough it's not real labor, even though I am having some contractions, but they straight cath me and get a urine sample, which shows that I was dehydrated and may even have a UTI, hooray isn't pregnancy FUN! Well, after they're done monitoring me, I go to the bathroom and it seriously kills to pee and there was even some blood in my urine, so I'm a little distressed about that, but no big deal, I'll just go home and rest and drink the 2 liters of water they told me I need to be drinking. BAD IDEA to try and drink all 2 liters of water in four hours because 1) It still hurts like mad to pee, and 2) I have to pee like every half hour. One thing I tell everyone I wish they had told me about in pregnancy is that yeah, you have to pee A LOT in your first and third trimester, but especially in your third trimester you may not be able to pee! WHAT??? Sometimes I sit on the toilet forever, my bladder feeling like it's going to burst and then when I finally do manage to pee, only a slow, annoying trickle comes out that takes forever to empty. Last night, after my wonderful experience with the catheter, I woke up in the middle of the night, needing to pee super bad, so I roll out of bed, and my bladder goes into spasms, that send me almost to the floor, clutching the chair and nearly screaming bloody murder. Oh, I forgot to mention that one of the lovely things about being short and pregnant, is that a full term baby really has no where to go and can crush your ureter, making it harder to urinate. Also, anatomically, everything down there is a lot closer together due to the excess pressure of baby sitting on my bladder and it can give me spasms down there, making it hard to lay on my side (the suggested way to lie during pregnancy) and making it even worse to pee.
So these are all the things I've had to deal with while being pregnant, and as I'm praying to God to just put me out of my misery, I'm also praying to him that he will send me a healthy, happy baby and that in the end, after all the suffering and crying and breakdowns, that I will just be happy to have a beautiful baby girl in my arms. Yes, pregnancy can be hard, and yes, I've had my fair share of complaining, I mean my body has literally been taken over by a parasite, and let's face it, I will never be put back to the way I was before I was pregnant. But, in the end, I know all of it will be worth it when I look into my baby's eyes for the first time. I may have had a horrible night, but it's a new day, and God has granted me the strength to keep going, even though sometimes I wish I could just give up, but it's the trials that make us stronger and if we can just hold on for a minute longer, our troubles are often over in the blink of an eye. The human body is an amazing creation. I once heard a statistic saying that the human body can only handle so much pain, but a woman in labor suffers more pain than a normal body could cope with. What an amazing thing it is to be able to birth a baby and to give life to such an extraordinary creation. Can there be anything closer to God than witnessing the birth of new life? I don't think so...
This pregnancy has also been filled with disaster, luckily my sweet baby Olivia Jewel has been unaffected, but her mom might be crazier for all that she had to go through. Between April and May, I was involved in not one, but TWO car accidents in the span of three weeks. I won't go into the details, but both times I was sent to the hospital to be monitored and have the baby monitored. The second time I was having contractions, but I didn't even notice because of all that had happened. I'm not to the end of the road yet though, and although my baby looks beautiful on the monitor and in the Ultrasound pictures, I'm expecting to give birth to a 3-headed dragon who won't stop crying. I guess a mother will never stop worrying about her children...
Some of the little things I've gone through are the normal things you hear about, difficultly sleeping in the last trimester: check. Acid reflux: check (Oddly enough the only thing I felt could cure my acid reflux is root beer; it doesn't make sense, I know, but man that root beer is good stuff). I'd also like to give a shout-out to Tums (the generic berry flavors are disgusting and the real-deal regular Tums are good, but both are just as effective) and to Pepcid AC. Without either of these, I could not get through my day. Nausea and vomiting: check. I didn't have too much sickness in the beginning, but I do remember that a certain, strong-smelling soup made me vomit on our way home from a party. Swelling in my ankles and feet: check, but not too much thankfully. Feeling extremely hot: check. I'd suggest NEVER doing the Fourth of July in your ninth month of pregnancy, it is just miserable. Crazy dreams: check. Back aches: DOUBLE CHECK!
Yesterday, I had my first false alarm labor attack. I knew I probably wasn't in labor, but after spending the afternoon shopping with my sweet mother-in-law, I guess I kind of overdid it and became dehydrated, although I swear I had been drinking a lot of fluids that day and it just goes to show it's never enough when you're pregnant and almost a hundred degrees outside. Anyway, so as we're walking around the mall I start to feel pressure in my lower back kind of like the ache you get when your hips are separating, but the pressure doesn't go away, it just gets worse, until nothing I do to try to relieve the pain makes it go away. The pain builds to a point where I can barely talk and then goes in and out like waves. It felt like the worst back period cramps I've ever had, but strangely I'm not having any regular contractions. My mother-in-law encourages me to call the doctors' office and so I do and of course they tell me to come in and get checked out, even though they tell me it doesn't sound like real labor. At that point I didn't care, the pain the was so excruciating and I just wanted some relief and answers. So I go in and sure enough it's not real labor, even though I am having some contractions, but they straight cath me and get a urine sample, which shows that I was dehydrated and may even have a UTI, hooray isn't pregnancy FUN! Well, after they're done monitoring me, I go to the bathroom and it seriously kills to pee and there was even some blood in my urine, so I'm a little distressed about that, but no big deal, I'll just go home and rest and drink the 2 liters of water they told me I need to be drinking. BAD IDEA to try and drink all 2 liters of water in four hours because 1) It still hurts like mad to pee, and 2) I have to pee like every half hour. One thing I tell everyone I wish they had told me about in pregnancy is that yeah, you have to pee A LOT in your first and third trimester, but especially in your third trimester you may not be able to pee! WHAT??? Sometimes I sit on the toilet forever, my bladder feeling like it's going to burst and then when I finally do manage to pee, only a slow, annoying trickle comes out that takes forever to empty. Last night, after my wonderful experience with the catheter, I woke up in the middle of the night, needing to pee super bad, so I roll out of bed, and my bladder goes into spasms, that send me almost to the floor, clutching the chair and nearly screaming bloody murder. Oh, I forgot to mention that one of the lovely things about being short and pregnant, is that a full term baby really has no where to go and can crush your ureter, making it harder to urinate. Also, anatomically, everything down there is a lot closer together due to the excess pressure of baby sitting on my bladder and it can give me spasms down there, making it hard to lay on my side (the suggested way to lie during pregnancy) and making it even worse to pee.
So these are all the things I've had to deal with while being pregnant, and as I'm praying to God to just put me out of my misery, I'm also praying to him that he will send me a healthy, happy baby and that in the end, after all the suffering and crying and breakdowns, that I will just be happy to have a beautiful baby girl in my arms. Yes, pregnancy can be hard, and yes, I've had my fair share of complaining, I mean my body has literally been taken over by a parasite, and let's face it, I will never be put back to the way I was before I was pregnant. But, in the end, I know all of it will be worth it when I look into my baby's eyes for the first time. I may have had a horrible night, but it's a new day, and God has granted me the strength to keep going, even though sometimes I wish I could just give up, but it's the trials that make us stronger and if we can just hold on for a minute longer, our troubles are often over in the blink of an eye. The human body is an amazing creation. I once heard a statistic saying that the human body can only handle so much pain, but a woman in labor suffers more pain than a normal body could cope with. What an amazing thing it is to be able to birth a baby and to give life to such an extraordinary creation. Can there be anything closer to God than witnessing the birth of new life? I don't think so...
Thursday, November 17, 2011
A Grim Ending??? Keep reading to find out!!!!
Well folks, I am nearly done rewriting the Grim Manor and I can't believe how long it has taken me! Some of you may have had the unique opportunity of reading my book or at least a little of it, and I want to give people that opportunity again. The general rule that I ask is that you read it for content and enjoyment and not editing purposes. For those of you who have read it before, the book is essentially the same, but I feel there is much more character development and relationship development. Besides my family, I will allow others to read it on a google doc, so you must ask for my permission to do this. I am truly pleased with it and I hope you will be too! Here is an excerpt from my book that will hopefully get you excited and interested and yearning for more :)
Lily could tell the car was moving fast, as if it were Hell-bent. She wasn’t sure what time it was when the car finally stopped, but she was relieved to be rid of the cramped compartment. The relief quickly vanished though, as she was seized by rough hands and transferred into another vehicle of some sort.
This vehicle was black too, but it had much more space to move around. From the sound of horses’ hooves clip-clopping on the road, Lily surmised that she was in a coach. She balled herself up into the corner of the seat farthest from the door, biting her lip to keep herself from crying out. Why were they in a coach? Why not stay in the car? Where was she? As she waited for what seemed like ages, the coach came to a halt and this time the shrouded figure yanked the coach door open with such force that Lily fell off of the seat.
He pulled her out of the coach by her ankle as if she were a rag doll. It was raining hard and Lily could feel herself getting drenched as he yanked her out of a puddle. She caught sight of her captor’s face one more time and was startled to once again to find that she found him hauntingly attractive. She quickly dispelled all such thoughts and tried to rid herself of the enchantment he held upon her. She was being kidnapped and she had to escape! Lily started to struggle, but he was so strong that she could barely move. She started screaming again, trying to hold back with her feet, breaking one of the heels off of her boot, but her efforts were in vain.
“Let go of me!” She shrieked, screaming into his ear as loud as she could. He purposefully slammed her into a stone wall, stunning her for a moment. She shook her head in a daze, but was instantly back in the fight, clawing at him and everything she could get her hands on, sinking her teeth into his hand as he tried to muffle her screams, but he pushed her further and further down the stairs as Lily tried to escape back to her home. He grabbed her by the hair and Lily yelped in pain, tears now streaming down her face. He threw her through a wooden door, following closely on her heels.
Lily had been so bent on escaping that she hadn’t even noticed her surroundings. This looked like a room in a dungeon, with a large table and manacles hanging on the walls. Lily turned towards her abductor, who was putting on a mask that looked to be part human skull and part raven with a long, menacing beak. His robes were covered in black, ornamental feathers, and he put his hood up once more. He looked like a dark spirit as he swooped towards her, picking her up and setting her gingerly on the stone table. He immediately grabbed her wrists and chained them with manacles. Lily’s eyes were wide with fear and confusion.
“What do you want from me?!” Lily’s voice quavered as she spoke, then her breathing turned into hyperventilating as he took a glinting black scythe from the wall.
He laughed softly, almost apologetically. “What do I want from you?” His gloomy eyes bore into hers. “I want freedom.” He raised the scythe above her and she screamed in terror
Sunday, October 16, 2011
This is War
Lately I have felt a dark cloud come over my life, telling me that we no longer live in a world where we can just ignore what is going on. My friends, we are at WAR. No, I am not talking about the war in Iraq, or any war that we are fighting far away from our blessed country. I am talking about the everyday battles we fight to win the war against Good and Evil. Satan is a real being with a real cause to lead away the hearts of men into misery. I think that often we think of war as a battleground where there are soldiers with guns or planes with bombs. Well, Satan has some guns and bombs of his own and there are plenty of casualties that have been littered along the way. Satan doesn't use weapons of reality though; he uses doubt, fear, hatred, and greed to fight his battles. Our government is becoming more corrupt everyday. The morality of the world has been decreasing for a long time and yet people will still not accept the fact that they are in the midst of a very important and extreme WAR.
The choices you make everyday tip the scales of this war either in the favor of the good or bad. Let me tell you something though: the GOOD will ALWAYS WIN!!!! Satan will not be able to tempt humanity forever, but we will always have the choice to stand up for what is right, instead of standing up for what is popular and immoral. Jesus Christ is my Savior and King and I will fight for what is right no matter what the cost, no matter if I am asked to lay down my own life for Him and for this battle we are fighting against Satan. The world is not going to get any better, so you must personally make the choice to fight on the right side, or to sit idly by as everything as you know it turns to chaos and destruction. When Christ comes again, he will bring peace to the world, but will you feel peace after the choices you've made? Everyone wake up and realize that this is WAR. Whose side are you on?
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
The Grim Life
So I'm sure a lot of you are wondering, if you haven't heard already, that I am writing a book and that it's about the Grim Reaper! Duh, duh, DUH!!! Ooo Scary! Well, anyway, here is a short description of the book, maybe it will even be on the inside cover one day :)
THE GRIM MANOR
Seventeen-year-old Elizabeth Sherwood, known as Lily to her friends, just loves a good mystery, but when presented with the greatest mystery of all: Death, she must find out in a world filled with gloom and sorrow if she can handle the truth and face her demons. Shortly after falling in love for the first time, Lily's world is shattered after she is abducted by the Grim Reaper, a man named Darren Grim, who suffers from a curse set upon him by a sorceress where all the males in his family must play the role of Death. But Darren is harboring some old wounds and secrets of his own that forces him to make heinous decisions and threatens to shatter his soul in the process. A new love for Lily also arises as Darren's brother Cal comes to stay at the manor, pulling Lily's emotions and heart in all directions. As Lily struggles with her hatred for Darren, and Darren struggles with his hatred for himself, will either of them ever discover who the true monster is that is lurking in the shadows?
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